By Eustace C. Jackson.
March 17, 2016.
On Thursday March 3rd 2016, we the people received a news flash. Brian Pagliano, an IT guy (probably former) at the State department, has accepted an immunity deal that would allow him testify freely without fear or favor.
What? Brian who? Immunity from what? We’re talking about Brian? Yawn yawn. Next!
77 National Security experts, including Secretary Michael Chertoff, GW’s Homeland Security guy and General Michael Hayden, who ran GW’s CIA and NSA at various times, decried Trump’s position on waterboarding and other so-called Enhanced Interrogation Techniques. So what? 22 Leading Conservative Voices spoke before – in vain and now 77 Security Experts! What’s next? 99 Gun Advocate Activists or 111 Anti-Abortion Fanatics or 222 Key Renegades? Oh puleeease, give Eustace a break!
They don’t know Jack!
Slow news day! Bye for now.
And then the Mitt dropped the Tomahawk sledgehammer! Indeed, Mitt dropped a big one. And what did Mitt say? In an unprecedented display of internal rancour and intrigue, a former (failed) flag bearer of a major party emerged from the dustbin of history to slam the current front-runner in the current presidential election cycle. “So what?” You say. “Here’s what”, Eustace responds. He verbally body slammed the primaries front-runner of his own party, the one to whom the flag will likely be handed, with a charge to carry it all the way to 1600. At the University of Utah, Mitt Romney gave an excoriating speech in which he washed down the Republican nomination front-runner, Donald John Trump, describing him in part as an unstable, phony, fraudulent, con man, who’s word is as worthless as a degree from the controversial Trump University. He also cleverly accused Trump of being stupid by saying he is “very very not smart”. He then fired a poisonous dart at Trump’s main calling card , charging that “a business genius he is not”.
Any which way you look at it, those are crystal-clear fighting words. Mitt was taking it to Donald. And he (Mitt) wasn’t even in the cage! What is going on here?
And then in a very carefully choreographed sequence of events, Senator John “Mavureek” McCain, not even 10 minutes later, joined in, releasing a statement, aligning himself completely with his “friend and former republican nominee for president”, expressing his disapproval of a potential Trump candidacy. Girls and boys, this in Eustace’s parlance is known as “igirigi”, a declaration of hostilities, just a shade below “ijakadi”, a total declaration of war!
It doesn’t take too long to recognize that these two establishment figures were not only the last two republican candidates, it had taken both of them 2 attempts each to win the nomination and in one of both their attempts, had faced off against each other, in which case, there was no love lost between them. They however quickly made up, like politicians do, even after acrimonious contests, endorsed each other and were both tireless campaigners for each other’s presidential contests. They also both met their Waterloo as Obama’s back-to-back whipping kids who were also both very grateful recipients of Trump’s endorsements and checks 4 and 8 years ago respectively. So what could’ve gone so wrong in the cycles up to this point that would cause these two to so blatantly and publicly turn on their own? The short answer is Trump. Donald Trump came on the scene and quickly made some things very clear.
One was that he was coming into the race with his winning ways and was in to win, by all means. Another was to make clear that if you’re not winning, you’re losing. And if you’re losing, then, well, you’re a loser! Basic logic 101. Who wouldn’t get that? And with that simple perspective, the Donald went about his business, canvassing for support and calling out losers along the way. His victims included Senator McCain. And Governor Romney. But there’s usually more to these type things than they appear to be. And this is no exception.
First Senator McCain. McCain is perhaps one of the most beloved people in the US Senate and certainly moreso in the Republican caucus. He is widely revered for his heroic service in Vietnam, where he also spent almost 6 years as POW – a guest at the infamous Hanoi Hilton. He was captured after his plane was shot down during a daredevil bombing mission. He endured incessant and debilitating torture in the hands of his captors, leaving him with lifelong skeletal injuries. And then he did something so selfless and noble, that he earned the love and adulation of world at large and the respect and adoration of his captors to this day. He turned down the offer for an early out-of-sequence release, insisting the POWs captured before him either be released sequentially ahead of him and if not, then release them alongside him and if not, to let him be. Indeed, the Geneva Convention as well as the US Code of Conduct both stipulate that POWs be treated humanely and equally without any f avoritism or partiality. Gals and boys, it’s easier said than done and McCain certainly would’ve been excused had he accepted the release, especially considering the nature and extent of his injuries.
McCain, the self-defined Maverick, never shies away from tongue-lashing the president on any number of issues. On May 31st, 2014, the Obama administration announced it had released 5 aging suspected terrorists, who had been held 13 years without indictment nor trial, at the increasingly infamous Guantanamo Bay detention camp, in exchange for a certain Army Sergeant Bowe Bergdahl, who had been in Taliban captivity for 5 years. This is keeping with the US military tradition of ensuring no man, dead or alive, is left behind. Bergdahl, now on trial on desertion charges and recently diagnosed with Schizotypal Personality Disorder and PTSD, has been described by fellow soldiers as an eccentric deserter, who abandoned his post for no discernable reason, leading to the death of 5 of their brot hers, in their efforts to find him. This prevalent narrative poisoned the well of goodwill, making that transaction controversial. A red-faced hyperventilating McCain, about frothing in the mouth, didn’t need to say a word to express his rage. But he did anyway, questioning the wisdom of the exchange, considering that the released suspects were “the hardest of the hard core”! McCain also oftentimes ditched his party to be the voice of reason on such sensitive matters as exemplified by his fierce opposition to the tenuous so-called Enhanced Interrogation Techniques as advocated by GW, Rumsfield, John Bolton, Wolfowitz and the heartless Cheney and their ilk, ALL artful draft dodgers. And that is why about every sensible person gasped in disgust and disbelief when the loudmouth billionaire, himself another draft-dodging child of the privileged, separated his frowning lips and declared McCain was no war hero, especially BECAUSE he was captured! Wha wha wha whaaaat? Eustace needs a quick v ex break!………… He’s back. Lets just agree that was obnoxious and sacrilegious and just outright offensive. And the outrage was fast and furious and from all angles. That, Eustace believes was the 2nd or 3rd time Trump’s campaign was supposedly on the brink of imminent implosion. Alas, that was not to be.
Because we don’t know Jack!
But Eustace observed something very remarkable (as always he does); Senator McCain went radio silent! The one who never saw a Sunday morning show he wouldn’t appear on suddenly went mattresses (that’s a Mafia term!) He went incommunicado! He let everyone else do the venting. He played the ultimate victim to the hilt. Granted, it’ll have been very odd for him to step up and say “hey my friends, I am a war hero”! But Eustace submits to you that much like Trump’s taxes, there’s probably some apprehension behind that silence. Perhaps the unfiltered Trump had unknowingly unraveled a little bit of a stain about McCain’s heroism. Just a little bit. And here it is, in summary. During the particular mission in which John McCain was shot down and captured, he received during his descent, ample warning that the enemy below had his aircraft tracked by their sophisticated Soviet supplied surface-to-air missile defense system. McCain did not pull back up, but instead maintained his descent and delivered his payload. He was shot down on his way back up. It is true that many naval airmen would’ve and actually did do the same things as did McCain, the problem in the case of McCain is that he had garnered a reputation for carelessness and recklessness as well as insubordination, a disregard for minor Naval rules and regulations and a disdain for regimentation.
Be reminded though that McCain did conduct himself with bravery and selflessness and has the scars and the medals to show for it. He also volunteered for the most perilous missions and performed with distinction. But there’s a difference between bravery and foolhardiness, between thrill seeking and valor between sacrifice and brazeness. Girls and boys, you decide. In a twist of irony, McCain’s father, Admiral John S. McCain Jr., was later to be appointed the Commander of the Vietnam Theater, thereby facing the unenviable task of executing the war plan and potentially ordering the strike that would kill his own son, were he to be used by the Vietnamese as a human shield. A point can be made on Bergdahl’s behalf: he probably didn’t have the presence of mind prior to his action. McCain? Not so much.
So it’s conceivable that McCain would be mega pissed that the one who so openly and blatantly profaned his vaunted heroism status, not only didn’t pay any price for it, he actually seemed to benefit from it! Plus he (Trump), was most responsible for the early exit of his (McCain’s) buddy, Senator Graham, from the 2016 presidential race. What was completely underreported in all this is the fact that he (McCain) had stirred the Trump hornet’s nest when he described 15k Arizona Trump rally goers as “wackos”, which apparently is one of his favorite words. In any case, we can identify any number of motives for wanting to tear down Trump’s campaign.
But he don’t know Jack!
And then Romney. Mitt Romney, former governor of Massachusetts and savior of the 2004 winter Olympics in Salt Lake City in Utah, was also candidate for POTUS, both in the 2008 and the 2012 presidential election cycles. In 2012, he broke through to become the nominee, the first Mormon to go that far. Mitt, like many politicians, ran a two-faced campaign, comprising what he said in public and what he truly believed in private, where he went on to offhandedly discount the so-called lecherous 47% of the electorate!
Add to that his self-deportation prescription towards undocumented immigrants and you’ll begin to understand why the multi-millionaire bombed on election day. Mitt, born in 1947, lost woefully, ending up with 47% of the popular vote – the electoral loss wasn’t nearly as close! Some failed presidential candidates intentionally fade to the background for some self-reflection and well-deserved rest and healing because running for POTUS is a gruelling endeavor. Some give their wounds a quick licking, pull themselves up and get back to work (see John McCain). Some others fade away and permanently too, because they never really belonged (see Mitt Romney)! Soon after his abysmal underperformance in 2012, the Republican establishment seemed to be in a haste to exorcise their party of any traces of the one who had just sullied their brand. They had no further use of him and all assumed he had returned to his cutthroat money-making LBO ways at Bain. But apparently, he still had plenty use of the party. And there are two humans in the galaxy who knew the inner workings of Mitt’s scheming soul. Eustace has time after time elucidated Mitt’s unquenched and unquenchable lust to be POTUS, in part because of a sense of obligation to accomplish that which his beloved father unsuccessfully attempted. Sincerity has never been one of his strong points. His ambition to occupy the White House is blind and ruthless. When Eustace heard Governor Romney had called for Trump to release past and present tax returns, he (Eustace) felt that call was totally justified. Afterall, this was the transparent contender, who gave an impassioned speech, admonishing present and future contenders on the need for transparency. He then followed that up with the release of not 1, not 5, girls and boys, not even 10 years of tax returns, but all of 13 years of it! So by all means, he’s earned the right to make that call. But wait minute, Governor George Romney is no longer with us! What? It’s not Governor Romney “the father”, it’s Governor Romney “the son”, the one who carefully manicured his 2010 and 2011 returns to fit his fair tax narrative. He declined some of his major deductions and still ended up with a 14% net tax. Based on Warren Buffet’s revelation, it’s safe to assume that Mitt’s secretary more than likely paid at a higher effective tax rate than he.
These 3 things are factual about Mitt: he did intend to run again. Jeb! froze him out. He would seek any backdoor route to give it another try. Besides Eustace, Trump is the only other person who knew Mitt’s innermost vulturic designs on the candidacy. And that is why Trump never forwent any opportunity to call him out. Now that Trump continues to reach and surpass the ever-shifting goalpost of expectations, with his ever so vitriolic and hateful rhetoric, the Republican establishment is out of sorts, running helter skelter, in a dubious and nefarious attempt to dislodge their own front runner thereby subverting the will of the majority of their primaries electorate. This, after having exerted from him, a pledge to play nice and abide by the outcome no matter what that outcome may be. And now the so-called establishment is openly ganged up against him. With a flawed and failed former nominee taking a leading role.
All because, they don’t know Trump!
They make Eustace almost want to vote for Trump. Almost!
When forensic pathologist, Dr. Reince Priebus convenes the next autopsy in November, he would unveil several reasons why 16 crown princes and a crown princess failed to capture the nomination.
They didn’t know Trump!
On January 7th, 2014, Obama said of ISIS to the effect that if a junior varsity team put on Laker’s jerseys, that wouldn’t make them Kobe Bryant! Or something like that. As ISIS continued to grow in infamy, Obama continued and continues to catch well deserved flak for his embarrassing analogy. Likewise, the seasoned and talented replublican lineup chuckled and giggled when Trump declared in June of 2015. Indeed, it was laughable and entertaining and Eustace is guilty of many a laughter! And then he started to garner a following in a geometric progression in direct proportion to the caustic words he spoke. The crown princess and princes and their people turned prognosticators, deceiving themselves with the temporary aberrations of cycles past. Michelle Backman, Newt Gingrich, Ron Paul, Rick Santorum, Rick Perry, Herman “999” Cain and Fred Thompson were all front-runners at some point in the 2012 cycle, they said. Trump is simply a summer wonder and nobody pays attention till the fall, they claimed. Fall came and turned to winter and then early spring. Through it all, Trump kept at what he does perhaps better than any other; he branded himself in (America is going to hell, make America great again, win win win till your head spins, we’ll build a huge wall on Mexico’s dime, believe me) and branded everyone else out (ugly, lightweight, see that face/persona, ok doctor, liar liar, little and the most lethal of all, low energy!) And the people chucked it to strength and leadership and ate it all up. The crown princess and princes and their big-money sponsors can’t be accused of a flat-footed response; they did much worse – absolutely nothing, hanging their bids for the biggest job on earth on a myopic gamble that the surging and insurgent campaign of the billionaire rabble-rouser would somehow crumble on it’s own amateurish mass. None made any effort to get under his skin, nor did any make any attempt to brand him. Eustace, even with the power of hindsight, can’t say wi th any degree of certainty that any of those would’ve made any difference. The tragedy is we’ll probably never know for sure.
Trump is to the republicans what ISIS was and is to Obama and his administration; they both saw these maladies coming, but neither recognized them, until they (ISIS and Trump) were fully manifest. And for that reason alone, the crown princess and princes are disqualified from being president because being POTUS is a lot more complicated, complex and demanding than figuring out Trump!
A message from Eustace to Reince Priebus: the very best thing that can happen to the GOP is for Trump to win the nomination outright from the polls and not have to go through the variously described open/contested/multi-ballot/brokered convention in July. The GOP should make bold, align behind and exalt their front-runner. He can’t be that bad. Hey, one-and-a-half times, we elected GW! Just saying! So you should reverse and redirect that strategic voting strategy in favor of Trump. That way, when, not if, you lose, you’ll still have a have a party that lives to fight another day. Any other scenario would fracture the GOP probably irrevocably. You have done a yeoman’s job thus far, herding rancous cats. Eustace can’t imagine how your talkative predecessor would’ve done under the circumstances. But you must do even more to ensure the party of Lincoln and Saint Reagan doesn’t dissipate on your watch. Also, be careful about Mitt. He’s up to no good. Eustace’s father, erudite prof essor, a man of immense wisdom and unquestionable character and inestimable integrity, a justice of the peace, said to Eustace, “Eustace my son, you must not detest or disregard the marital advice of a divorcee. Listen carefully and intently. Then do the exact opposite”!
Reince, that is how you must handle Mitt Romney. Plus this is a good time to start the autopsy and get a headstart toward 2020!
From Eustace to Hillary: you’re the most qualified person running for president this cycle and probably top 5 ever. Period. If you overcome Bernie (Eustace expects you do) and face Trump in the general, that election may not be determined by merit.
If you don’t know Jack!
Because Trump doesn’t have merits. So your campaign must have a two-pronged approach – one prong to engage and stalemate Trump on his home court, the gutter. A dedicated PAC can focus on this prong to give you some deniability. Then unleash the second prong, unopposed (because Trump is mono-pronged) by demonstrating your unequalled fluency on the issues of concern, both domestic and foreign.
And we shall herald the second coming of the Clintons.
All because you do know Jack!
His name is Trump. John D. Trump. John is Jack. Jack is John. And it’s good to know Jack! That I have to tell you. Believe me! The elephants are burning, because they don’t know Trump!
Oh, about Brian Pagliano. He’s the IT guy from State who setup Hillary’s home email server. Those damned emails again? Yawn yawn big yawn! Hello Madam President!!
We the people say?
Trump: I win with everybody! The tall, short, anorexic, obese, the smart and the daft, especially the wackos, idiots, the bigots, demagogic, the racist, the ugly and low energy and the lightweight. Everybody!
Jeb!: When i came out of her, i opened my eyes and whoa! It’s Barbara Bush, future first lady! And my daddy is the greatest man ever – right behind Moses and Elijah and the Pope! I’m proud of my family name, but just call me Jeb!
Republicans: Saint Reagan is ahead of Moses and Elijah! No harm no foul Jeb!
Koboko: pig eat garbage. Dog eat pig. Dog eat s*i*t. Dog eat dog. Politicians eat dog. And crow! Gimme guiness stout. I drink with Irish for Patrick.